I had just gotten off the phone with a friend and fellow therapist who had asked me if I still wanted to pursue a PhD. While on the phone with her, I realized, for the first time in a decade, that I felt fully confident and at peace answering, “No.” It was not a “No”, due to circumstances or defeat. Rather, it was a “No”, due to sagacity. A “No”, due to learning more about myself, and my goals, and recognizing that a PhD would most likely not serve me the way I once thought it would career-wise. Instead of bringing me fear or sorrow, this realization brought me confidence and inspiration… for this blog. 😉
The Allure of Escapism: Returning to Grad School or Exploring a New Career Path
Life has a way of making us crave reinvention. Whether it’s the grind of daily routines, career burnout, or the relentless search for meaning, “starting over” can feel like an alluring escape. For many (like myself), this means returning to grad school for a PhD or exploring an entirely new career path. But is this desire truly about passion and growth, or is it a form of escapism?
The Promise of a PhD: Ambition or a Detour?
Pursuing a PhD is often seen as the pinnacle of intellectual achievement. It’s a dream steeped in the promise of deeper knowledge, academic prestige, and the opportunity to contribute meaningfully to your field. For some, it’s a natural next step in their career progression. For some, it’s a way to retreat from the discontent of their current reality.
But here’s the truth (from those close to me with Ph.D.s): a PhD is not a refuge. It’s a rigorous, often isolating journey that demands a deep well of resilience, focus, and intrinsic motivation. If the drive to enroll is fueled more by a desire to escape than a burning curiosity or clear career goal, the journey might lead to frustration rather than fulfillment.
Exploring a New Career: Reinvention or Avoidance?
Similarly, the idea of pivoting to a new career can be both exciting and intimidating. I cannot tell you the number of times I have considered business, law, or even UX Design! There’s an undeniable appeal in the chance to leave behind what’s familiar and redefine yourself. However, before leaping into a new field, it’s crucial to ask: What am I running toward? And what am I running from?
Escapism often masquerades as reinvention. The grass seems greener in another profession, but every job comes with challenges and setbacks. Without a clear understanding of your values, skills, and aspirations, the risk of trading one set of frustrations for another is high. —Please do not let this information discourage you from pursuing a PhD or a new career! I am a big advocate of dreaming and change- especially career-wise. However, I do think further examination can help before choosing when or what to change to.
Questions to Reflect On Before Making the Leap
If you’re considering grad school or a new career, take some time to reflect on these questions:
1. What is driving my decision?
– Is it passion, curiosity, or a strategic move? Or is it dissatisfaction and burnout?
2. Have I explored alternatives?
– Could a sabbatical, therapy, or a new hobby address my feelings without a drastic change?
3. What are the costs?
– Consider financial, emotional, and time commitments. Are you prepared for these sacrifices?
4. What does success look like?
– Define your end goal. Are you seeking fulfillment, stability, or prestige?
Escapism as a Catalyst for Growth
While escapism gets a bad rap, it isn’t inherently negative. Sometimes, the desire to escape signals that something vital is missing in your life. If used thoughtfully, it can be a catalyst for meaningful change. The key lies in aligning your actions with your authentic needs and goals rather than using them as a way to avoid discomfort.
Embracing Discomfort, Redefining Success
Before you dive into applications or start updating your résumé, take a moment to sit with the discomfort. What is it teaching you? Often, growth isn’t about changing your circumstances but about changing your perspective.
If after deep reflection you decide that a PhD or a new career is the right path, pursue it boldly. But if you realize that your current feelings stem from temporary dissatisfaction, consider smaller, intentional changes to rekindle your sense of purpose.
Ultimately, the best way to escape isn’t to run away—it’s to run toward a life that feels aligned with who you are, what you value, and what your goals are.
